Before we dive into this essay in the pruning series, let’s review our first two concepts:
- First, I wrote about pruning “to let go,” using the oak tree’s example of releasing limbs that no longer contribute nutrients.
- Second, I discussed the idea of pruning around purpose, using the metaphor of water being pulled by gravity to help us let go and reshape ourselves.
Rather than thinking of pruning as simply cutting something away, Nature reminds us that pruning can take many forms. This week I’ll extend that idea in a different direction. Sometimes pruning is not about removing a branch, or redirecting our energy.
Sometimes pruning is about shedding an identity that has become too small for who we are becoming.
Living systems are continually growing, adapting, and reshaping themselves. We are no different. Yet it is easy to think of our identity as something fixed, as though who we are today should remain unchanged throughout our lives. Nature suggests that growth requires us to release an old version of ourselves, so that a new one has room to emerge.
Shedding the old to grow into the new
The example I want to explore here is the way snakes shed their skin. While shedding may not immediately seem like pruning, it serves the same essential purpose. The old layer has done its job, but it can no longer support continued growth. It must be released so that what has already been developing underneath can fully emerge.
In snakes, Nature presents a perfect example of growing and changing through letting go, or intentionally pruning the old to make way for the new. We can apply what we learn from snakes to how we reshape our identity over time.
Snakes shed skin to grow. Their scales don’t stretch like our skin does. When their skin feels too tight, the shedding process begins. The snake first forms new skin underneath the old one, with a layer of fluid separating the two. Then the snake moves across rocks and other rough surfaces, helping the old skin slough off, or molt. This reveals the new skin already fully formed underneath, allowing the snake to get bigger and continue its evolution.
Shedding as a metaphor for retirement
For many people, identity has been intertwined with work for decades. As they step into retirement, they aren’t just leaving a job. They’re shedding an identity that has defined them for years. Now, a new identity takes shape, which can be troubling for some people and invigorating for others.
In other cases, the shift is quieter. Sometimes, it’s more of a “letting go” of beliefs about ourselves that were formed earlier in life. When we shed an old “skin” we replace those beliefs with an identity shaped by new experiences, deeper wisdom, and continued growth.
I have a friend who’s having an extraordinary time in her first year of retirement. I’ve known her for more than fifteen years. I watched her spend the last five years or so of her career intentionally imagining, testing, and building the habits that would support her new identity. Like the snake, she formed a new “skin” under the old one, while her working life was still meaningful and fulfilling.
Shedding identities can happen many times in our lives, and it’s often quite subtle. When we look look back to see ourselves in our family of origin, we may shed an identity we held as children. As we build capacity, knowledge, and successful experiences, we see ourselves differently and that, too, is a kind of shedding. It’s a shedding process that allows a fresh perspective on who we are, how we show up in the world, and how we take root. Over time, we transform into that new identity as we learn, grow, and achieve.
The world helps us shed
The snake’s shedding process is helped along by abrasion from the outside world, and our identity transforms in much the same way. Sometimes we’re reshaped by situations that feel jarring, like the rough terrain a snake moves through to help slough off the old skin. That friction might come from challenges or obstacles, or just some honest feedback from a trusted source.
If you’re in a season where your identity is shifting, I invite you to use the metaphor of shedding. This too, is a time of pruning. You’re removing the aspects of your identity that no longer apply to who you truly are. This helps you focus on more meaningful activites, as you move toward your highest self.
